how to tell if someone is really bisexual:
- if a true bisexual utters their name backwards, it will send them back to their home dimension for a minimum of 90 days.
- fire type bisexuals will always be able to learn the move solarbeam, unless they are flareon.
- biologically, bisexuals are incapable of going down stairs.
- some bisexuals are unable to cast a shadow, though this is currently up for debate
The successful candidate will have a minimum of five years experience in a similar role, own their own transport, be related to someone I know and like, be proficient in Excel and kangaroo wrangling, have gold-plated nipples, and be willing to work full hours at minimum wage.